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August 4, 2010.
Lac Ouareau, late afternoon.
Begin #1 August 2010, a diptych that’s two
clichés...
Conceived as a diptych, with the August 3 “life” text on the right and
the “death” text on the left.
Night.
Trying to put the texts in and making notes of what they
really mean…
On the right:
“These lines and scratches, smears and smudges,
now and always the sharing of our immortality.”
That is to say, my
kinaethesis making them now, enters your kinaesthesis whenever in the
future (a thousand years?) you see them. We pass sooner, the work of
art lasts longer.
On the left:
“Every journey for each is different,
the last journey for each ends the same.”
That is to say, we are
all different but at the end we’re all gone. |
August
5, 2010.
Lac Ouareau, late late night (it’s 2am of tomorrow)
More looking and working on #1 August—
I heard and did…
“Oh, Jesus, put the cum spiral in, center, where it always only is for
all of life/death and hereafter.”
August
6, 2010.
Lac Ouareau, late afternoon.
For #1 August, put the red dot center bottom.
Night.
For #1 August, put the green dot center top.
August
7, 2010
Lac Ouareau, afternoon.
Looking at #1 August, it is such firm prose.
Except where the gray spray on the left should have been darker. So,
on the death side, there’s a formal error, an unbalance in a
symmetrical composition… a void there on the left (the death side),
none on the right (the life side). And, death is that. Look into it,
the void on the left. How clearly unclear it is, the hole back into
death the unknown. |
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#2 August 2010.
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August 7, 2010
Lac Ouareau, late afternoon.
Start and finish (?) #2 August 2010.
I heard the text and made the painting, messing up the text with a
drop of spit while trying both to understand and to integrate it.
The text I heard was…
“Hey there old sick at heart and falling down
What needs have you for return to life?”
And that is what I wrote on the painting.
I meant it to mean, “What things would I need to have in order to
return to life from my depression.?” But each time I read “What needs
have you for return to life?” that it was already too late to take off
the painting, it seemed to mean “Why bother to live?” instead of “What
do I need to do to keep on living?”
August 8, 9, 10, 2010.
Lac Ouareau, each night.
Trying to find a way to rewrite the fatal sentence in
#2, August, and not finding a way to do it.
August 11, 2010
Lac Ouareau, night.
Finish #2 August 2010 with the yellow sun
disk. Resolution of the formal needs of the painting gave at the same
time the reason—the “need”—to live. It’s for the sun.
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August 11, 2010
Lac Ouareau, night.
Making #3 August 2010...
It’s the whole Goddam trip in a bottle.
August 15, 2010.
Lac Ouareau, night.
Looking at #3 August…
I had put the tiniest speck of red in the death cross. You can hardly
see it from even six feet away. But there is a vibration there that
calls you closer… to the promise of life again.
The painting is not
perfect in its balance and fulfillment. One of Edward Said’s “art
historical catastrophes”? Fine, let it be. |
#3 August 2010.
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#6 August 2010.
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August 19, 2010.
Lac Ouareau, afternoon.
Of #6 August, I heard…
“Give it to me, give it to me,” as a “begging the Lord”.
August 20, 2010.
Lac Ouareau, afternoon.
Looking at #6 August, what about the
empty space at the top? Leave it. It is that, as the particulars
we are, we cannot know of the infinite origin beyond us.
Yes, in #6
August the beyond us is just
empty paper with a few wrinkles. |
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